What Your Husband Really Wants

Did you know that he is doing his best? He’s not perfect because it’s not possible to be perfect. He can’t read your mind. He can’t get it right every time. He can’t always remember what special event is going on, or to schedule that date night. But he is doing his best, and what he wants most? What your husband really wants? For you to be happy. Simple as that.

But he can’t make you happy. Only you can make you happy.

I thought that being married would make me happy. I thought that having kids would make me happy. I was happy before I got either of these, but I thought that the happiness I would have after would be different somehow. Fuller. Or truer in some way.

When I got married and became a mom and my happiness level didn’t change, I thought that something was wrong with me. I thought I was broken. Or that my relationship with Nic was broken. Something was wrong with my life since I wasn’t experiencing it how I thought I should be.

Turns out the only thing that was wrong with my life, was where I was putting my expectations. I can’t wait for someone else to make me happy. I can’t expect Nic or my kids to change their behaviors so that I can be happy. I need to decide that I am in control of my own emotions, no matter what goes on outside of my control.

And even after realizing this concept, how many times I find myself putting those expectations on everything but me! It’s such a worn habit in my brain, and it happens so automatically without me even realizing it. It doesn’t always show up in that exact thought, “If x happens, then I will be happy.” More often than not, it’s a subtle underlying feeling. An expectation that is there without me realizing it. It takes stepping back, becoming aware of the thoughts that are going through my brain, and then deciding to change it.

Your husband wants you to be happy and enjoy your life.

Do you?