Learning To Love Me

I am lying on my back as the yoga class comes to an end. I hear the teacher speaking, as though just to me. “When you leave this room, don’t leave your yoga practice behind. Bring it with you into your daily life. Bring the self love, the confidence, the nonjudgement of yourself. Trust in your truth. You are you, and that is enough.” The tears begin to leak from the corners of my eyes, rolling quietly down my face. I feel the remaining tension leave my body as I melt into the mat.

I need to hear this right now. That accepting myself – mom, wife, friend, me – as I am. I strive to be the person I want to be, but to balance it with loving myself on that journey. Taking out the constant berating of myself when I fail to react how I think I should. Being easier on myself as I figure out what this all means to me. Loving the faulty and imperfect me and acknowledging that I am trying my best. And it’s okay.

I read words like this in blog posts, books, hear them on podcasts and from friends. But in this moment, the meaning of them hit me. The actual doing of them, of bringing them into my life and making them a part of me. I don’t need to be a certain way, do certain things, or act certain ways in order to be worthy of love. I am worthy of love from my husband, myself, my friends, because I am. I bring myself to each situation, and that is different from what everyone else brings.

Learning to love. I am me; no more, no less. Enough.