Postpartum Depression; Not a Problem

What if postpartum depression isn’t a problem?

When we experience it once, the thought of it consumes so much of us the next time around.
It’s as though there is a dark cloud, always hanging on the horizon.
We’re watching it, worrying if it’s going to come closer.
Constantly judging its distance from us.
Fearing that today it's closer than yesterday.

But with all of this fear and worry, all of this resisting and trying to avoid – that dark cloud descends.
It feels like we have no choice. No control.
It feels like it’s happening to us again.

Even with all of our preparation.
Even with all of our awareness and the work that we’ve done.
We spin out in our thoughts, thinking again that maybe this is just how it will always be.
It's not.
Rather than resisting it, lean into it instead.
Lean into the fear, the worry, the darkness.
See those thoughts that are in your head. Write them out.
Acknowledge these feelings. Feel them.

There is space here for all of it – all of the darkness.
This isn’t reacting; it’s just being.
It's sitting with these feelings and where we are at.

Our brains want to tell us it’s not safe to do this. That we must run away from it.
That if we allow ourselves to feel depressed, then it will just take over us. Take over our life.
It won't.

When we allow ourselves to feel instead of resist, we see that it's just another emotion.
One that is here, and then leaves.

Resisting always leaves us at the effect of our depression.
Feeling it brings us into control.

So instead of hiding, instead of pushing it away, instead of reacting to it – today I want you to just allow those feelings to be there.
Wrap yourself in a hug, and just let it be.

This darkness can feel scary to sit with on our own – but this is the most important work that we can do. It’s called holding space, and it’s one of the greatest gifts that I bring to my session with my clients. It’s space for them to open up to these thoughts and feelings, and to see that it means nothing about them.

If this is what you need, reach out.

You are not broken.
You are whole.